Dear The State of Colorado,
I’m leaving the site in your hands next week while I’m on vacation.
We aren’t really friends, and I can’t vouch for you in public (how can I even guarantee you’ll post?)– Hell, I only met you five or six times, and you’re always wearing those stupid fucking down vests trying to hide some nose bleed, all “I’ve got a hot tub” this, and “bwoop-bwoop” with your K5 Jeep and blow-dried hair.
BUT! But you do have a nice condo in the mountains that I’m using for a week, so fuck away, shitbag! The site’s all yours.
Seriously, burn it, sell it, whatever,
Gene Morgan
PS – Leave the Jeep keys with the chef.